Breakthrough Read online

  “Okay.” She dragged the word out. She furrowed her brow. I wanted to smooth it out with a touch or a kiss, but stopped short of reaching out to her.

  “How about if I stay here at the cabin tomorrow when you go to work. I’ll keep to myself. I will stay right here on this couch.” I patted the couch.

  “No.”

  “What do you mean ‘no’? Brynn, nobody knows I’m here. Nobody knows that we’re friends. Chances are, those hunters are long gone,” I said. She looked like she was considering it. I pushed harder. “I promise to stay inside. Right here.”

  “I don’t know, Kennedy. I would feel better if you were with me.” She rubbed her hands nervously on her jeans.

  “Come on. This is the safest place on Earth. You see how easy it is to get lost when I write. I don’t even remember the last two hours. I would get so much done.”

  “Well, if you need the time, I guess it makes sense.” She seemed to relax after coming to that decision. “You’re right. Nobody knows where you are. Just don’t get upset if I call you several times.”

  “Did Lara have any information?” Lara called Brynn while we were at lunch. Brynn missed the call and didn’t realize it for several hours.

  Brynn sighed heavily. “No, they weren’t able to enhance the photo, unfortunately. Lara said they are reasonably certain they are Alaskan license plates, but they couldn’t even confirm that. Her department is tracking down all makes and models of both trucks. It’s just going to take some time.” All of the plates had been mud spattered. I wondered if that was strategic to make them difficult to identify.

  “I think it’s sweet that you have taken on the role of my protector, but I don’t think all of this is necessary. You’ve gone above and beyond for me.”

  “We’re friends. I take care of my friends,” she said.

  “So.” I started because it was the perfect segue and I couldn’t help myself. “Speaking of friends, tell me about you and Lara. You seem pretty close and comfortable with one another.” Did I just sound jealous? “Is there a story there?”

  “Always the reporter, huh?” She laughed.

  She stood and went into the kitchen to pour more hot water in her cup. She looked out the kitchen window for a few moments. I waited patiently even though my curiosity was tearing me up inside. I felt queasy.

  “We tried dating when I was real young. Right after the Porta Potti incident. We went out a few times, but decided it would be best to be friends,” she said.

  “That’s it? That’s all I get?” I wanted every juicy detail. Not really. Just more than what she gave me.

  “There’s nothing else to tell. We were at different points in our lives. I was just getting started. A baby dyke who wasn’t even old enough to drink. She was older and wanted a relationship. I didn’t. I wasn’t over my girlfriend in Florida.” She sat back on the couch, this time closer to me.

  “What about now? Is she taken?”

  “No.”

  “No? That’s it? Nothing else?” I was dying to know why they weren’t trying. “You obviously have your shit together now.”

  “I have a lot of respect for Lara, but that’s it. We will only ever be strictly platonic.” Her explanation was vague and boring. Something happened, but she wasn’t going to tell me. I got the sense the real story had nothing to do with Lara. Brynn was driving me crazy with her secrecy. I had no right, but I wanted to get to know her better.

  I had no response. We sat and stared at the fire until we were both uncomfortable. Brynn shifted her weight, crossed and uncrossed her arms, and eventually stood to stoke the fire. The room was getting smaller and smaller by the minute. I decided to make my retreat.

  “Okay, well, I’m going to bed. Thanks again for cooking dinner and letting me write,” I said.

  “It wasn’t a problem. I was cooking anyway.”

  I bristled at her explanation. She was pulling away from me and I wasn’t sure why.

  “Thanks. I’ll see you tomorrow. If I’m not up when you leave, have a good day.” I headed to the bedroom and shut the door, sad that our evening ended with a fizzle. I didn’t even get to say good night to Wally.

  Chapter Seventeen

  It was noon, and I was tired of being cooped up inside. I finished writing for the morning and decided to have a cup of tea out on the porch. The sun was shining after an early morning downpour. The afternoon was supposed to be on the warmish side. I threw on jeans, a T-shirt, and one of Brynn’s quilted flannel shirts that was hanging on the back of a kitchen chair. It was large on me, but it smelled like her. I was sure she wouldn’t mind. Our few days together in her cabin were nice and amicable, but I still wanted her. Every so often, I would get a rush of heat when I caught her staring at me. She would smile nervously and look away. She was so hard to read. I poured my tea and headed outside with a rival magazine of A&A. It was always a good idea to keep up with the competition and I liked mindlessly thumbing through tangible pages instead of reading on my laptop. My eyes needed a break from the computer screen.

  I loved that Brynn had large wooden rocking chairs on her porch. Flower boxes draped over the railings held fresh soil. Brynn must have recently planted bulbs or seeds. A red and white bird feeder hung from the corner that faced east and a butterfly house stood tall several feet from the porch. The country look wasn’t something I would have gone for, but it added to the charm of the place.

  It was too quiet though. I heard birds, but no traffic, no people, no hustle of city living. I needed music. I headed back inside to grab my phone, but I couldn’t get back into the cabin. I jiggled the handle several times, the first time in disbelief and the ten after that in total panic. The door wasn’t going to open no matter how hard I pushed, pulled, or threw myself against it. I was locked out. I leaned my head against the door and sighed. Of course. My awesome luck continued. I tried all of the windows and the back door, but nothing budged.

  My heart sank. Not because I was scared, but that my phone—my contact to the outside world—was inside. I couldn’t believe I left it behind. I usually had it within reach at all times. Alaska was making me too soft and comfortable.

  The good news was that bad people and enraged animals weren’t chasing me. I was safe, yet alone here. Brynn’s closest neighbor was a few miles away. I had several hours to kill until Brynn showed up, so instead of freaking out, I took a deep breath and forced myself to relax. I decided to wander around Brynn’s property. I grabbed a walking stick I found next to the stairs to use as a means of protection and headed out past the shed to the great unknown. At least I had a decent breakfast so my energy level was high. The wind picked up when I climbed to the top of the hill. I buttoned Brynn’s shirt and snuggled in its warmth. Who knew someone could look so sexy in such practical clothes?

  The view where I stood was spectacular. I was bummed that I didn’t have my camera though. Brynn should’ve built her house up here. Mountains in every direction, budding wildflowers, and fresh air. For some reason, I felt safe. Maybe it was because I was wearing Brynn’s shirt or that I was standing in her little piece of the world, but I feared nothing. I had never known peace like this. I finally understood why Brynn stayed in Alaska. I just wanted to know the whole story of why she was here in the first place. I put my life in the hands of a stranger. What did I really know about her?

  “Kennedy.” I heard the panic in Brynn’s voice before I saw it on her face. She marched up the hill toward me. Her eyes were almost black by the time she reached me. I reached out to touch her arms. Her body was tense under my fingertips.

  “I’m so sorry. I locked myself out of your house. I went to have tea on the porch and forgot to unlock the door. I also left my phone on the kitchen counter. I’m fine though.”

  “I was so worried. You didn’t answer my texts or calls and I feared the worse.” She took off her jacket and put it around my shoulders. I wasn’t cold, but I didn’t want to be rude so I thanked her.

  “I’m fine. I couldn’t brea
k into your house, which is good news, but I got bored and decided to go for a walk. This is such a beautiful place, Brynn.”

  “Listen, Kennedy. I heard from Cee and Lara.” She took a deep breath and rubbed her hands over her face, a gesture I’d come to know as her way of calming down. “Cee said a guy asked about you yesterday. Then, last night, the cabin you were staying in was ransacked. She and John contacted the police. They spent the morning with Lara looking through photos at the station. The guy who asked about you wasn’t one of the three you had a run-in with.” She waited for the news to sink in.

  I stared at her for at least ten seconds while I processed the information, but I couldn’t understand. “So what does that mean?”

  “Apparently this is bigger than we thought. Showing up at the cabins was a dumb move, but vandalizing one of them is a lot more serious. These guys mean business.”

  “What the hell did I stumble on?” I wanted to lean on Brynn for support, but the look in her eyes told me now wasn’t the time to do it.

  “Lara’s getting the Alaska Department of Fish and Game involved, which means more resources for the investigation. Cee didn’t have a way to get a photo of the guy who visited her, but she gave a detailed description. With your photos and the incidents at Cee’s cabins, we have enough to get outside help. The locals can only do so much so I feel better about that,” she said. I didn’t know Brynn that well, but I’d never seen her so visibly worried. She was upset the other day when she insisted I say at her cabin, but not to this extent.

  “Well, I don’t think I’ll be here much longer. I’m sure my boss doesn’t need the publicity of one of her writers getting caught up in a poaching ring.” I almost smiled knowing Erin was going to completely lose her shit at my latest saga. I hadn’t told her yet because I honestly just thought it was a couple of dumbasses making bad decisions. I figured they’d be slapped with a large fine and be on their way.

  “You aren’t caught up. You’re a witness. There’s a difference,” Brynn said. “Are you ready to get warm by the fire? I’m sure my shirt isn’t exactly warm.” Busted.

  “I didn’t want to wear a coat because the sun felt good and your shirt was within reach. I hope you don’t mind that I wore it.” I wasn’t going to admit that it smelled like her and wearing it made me feel closer to her.

  “No, it’s fine. I’m just happy you had something somewhat warm. When the sun disappears, it gets cold. Spring isn’t the same here as it is in California.” We headed back to her house where she showed me a secret hiding place in the railing where there was a key.

  “Now you can get into my house any time you want.” She pointed at the smaller shed. “And that has a code you can punch and get inside. It’s not heated, but at least it will get you out of the elements. I have a portable stove in there, too.”

  “This won’t happen again. I’m not going to leave without checking the door a thousand times first. Plus, I can get in the front door, thanks to the secret key,” I said.

  Brynn quickly unlocked the front door and ushered me inside. “I’ll start a fire.”

  I liked watching Brynn work. She was lean and sinewy, and I enjoyed seeing her muscles bunch up under her uniform as she stacked the logs and quickly lit them. I wondered if her uniform was comfortable. It fit her like a glove, but didn’t seem to restrict her. It had to have been specifically tailored to fit. Nobody got that lucky off of the rack.

  “Do you mind if I take a shower? I think that will warm me the quickest. I won’t be long.”

  She nodded and continued working on the fireplace. “I’ll have a cup of tea ready for you when you return.” Her smile was sweet, but it didn’t reach her eyes. She was worried about me.

  I didn’t know how to feel about any of it. The fact that people were looking for me felt surreal. Until this point, my life had been straightforward. I focused on work and climbed that ladder. I never got into trouble, had only a few parking tickets on my record, and paid my bills on time. Sure, I was in the public eye, but never for anything bad. No death threats, nobody chased me, no real drama except that one, teeny, tiny indiscretion. That felt huge at the time, but nothing like this.

  Brynn was taking charge of me and I was allowing it. I didn’t mind that somebody was watching over me. I felt like I mattered for the first time in a long time. I was changing. I hopped out of the shower and put on my pajamas pants, a sweatshirt, and thick socks. My wardrobe was lacking, but I didn’t care. I was in a cabin being guarded by a strong, beautiful dyke.

  “You can borrow a pair of sweats. I can’t imagine those keep you warm.” Brynn pointed to a cup of steaming tea on the coffee table in front of my seat. “And that’s your cup of tea.”

  “Where’s Wally?” I didn’t remember seeing him when Brynn let us into the cabin.

  “I left him at the sanctuary. Tonight he has a sleepover at Tina’s,” she said.

  I frowned because I missed him. “Does he have a lot of sleepovers?”

  “Normally, no, but I panicked when I couldn’t reach you so she volunteered to watch him while I figured out what happened to you.” She sat in the chair to my left and stretched her long legs under the table. She had changed into an Alaskan Wildlife Rescue sweatshirt and a pair of jeans. I missed the uniform.

  “Remind me to buy a sweatshirt tomorrow at the sanctuary. I like the look of it,” I said. The navy color made Brynn’s eyes stand out.

  “I’d give you this one, but you are so tiny, I’d have to wrap it around you twice to get it to fit.”

  “I did wear your shirt today,” I said.

  “Yes, and you looked like a waif.” For some reason, that hurt my feelings. She must have sensed that it upset me. “I mean, I’m huge compared to you. We could never share clothes. I would tear yours up if I tried on your pajamas or your sweaters.” That didn’t make me feel any better. I nodded and turned my attention back to the fire. All of this was so strange to me. My fate was in the hands of somebody I didn’t know. I trusted Brynn, but I felt vulnerable. I was out of my element and I didn’t know how to handle my emotions.

  “Okay, well, I guess I’m going to go to bed early.” I stood. Brynn jumped up next to me.

  “It’s not even seven yet. Aren’t you hungry? Do you want me to make some dinner?” she asked. Her hand rested on my forearm. She didn’t want me to leave, but for some reason, I had to.

  “I probably just need to lie down. I’ll pass on dinner. I got to keep this waifish figure.” I didn’t know why I was being snarky. She moved her hand away from me and walked into the kitchen. I rolled my eyes at myself. I could be such an ass. “Thanks for rescuing me. Again.” I headed to my room and closed the door as quietly as I could. I was trapped. Sleep didn’t sound like such a bad idea. I pulled back the covers and slipped into bed. My mood was dark and I needed time to process my feelings. I was starting to care and I didn’t like how vulnerable that made me.

  Chapter Eighteen

  I was disoriented when I woke up. For a split second, I forgot where I was. It was dark and quiet. Wally wasn’t in the cabin wrestling with something. I remembered he was at a slumber party at Tina’s. It was hot so I threw off the covers and kicked them off of the bed. I was drowsy, but not enough to fall back to sleep. I padded over to the bathroom and drank a glass of cold water. I stripped to my panties and my tank top hoping to cool off. Why was it so hot in this room?

  I opened the door softly and walked to the kitchen. The water made my stomach gurgle, reminding me I was hungry. I opened the refrigerator, pulled out a peach, and stood over the kitchen sink to eat it. I peered out the window and watched the night. Alaska noises at midnight were different than L.A. noises. I would fail any basic animal sound identification test. It was so creepy that I actually lowered my head at one point as if the animals could see me staring out. I saw movement behind some trees, but I didn’t know if it was a fox, or a wolf, or the shadow of a tree moving in the night’s sudden breeze. There was no way I could live here in the middle
of nowhere with noises like that.

  “What do you see?” Brynn unintentionally sneaked up behind me to look out the window, too.

  I didn’t hear her approach so I screamed. “What the fuck, Brynn? You just can’t come out of nowhere like that.” I was breathing hard and pissed that she scared me.

  The corner of her mouth held the beginning of a smile and she was trying not to laugh. She put her hands on either side of me, her fingers curled around the edge of the sink. “I’m sorry. I thought you heard me.” She looked me in the eye, then I watched as her gaze traveled the length of my body to see what little I was wearing. I felt my nipples harden under her gaze. “Are you cold?”

  I shifted my weight from one foot to the other. She was in my personal space and wasn’t backing off. I felt a drop of peach juice on my cheek and wiped it off with the back of my hand. “No. I was actually hot and hungry and decided to come out for a snack. I found the peaches.” She was still close to me. I could feel her body heat and I shivered.

  “Do you always shiver when you’re hot?” She licked her lips. This was a very different and very confident Brynn standing in front of me, only inches from my body.

  I looked up at her and challenged her. “Only when I can feel somebody I want close to me.” She already knew I wanted her, so why not keep baiting her? She moved closer to me. I could feel her bare leg touching the outside of mine. I had to look up to meet her eyes. My heart leapt as she lowered her head and nuzzled her lips against mine.

  “Do you want me close to you?”

  My only answer was a slight moan. I opened my mouth as she ran her tongue gently over my bottom lip. As much as I wanted to press myself against her, I needed to know she wasn’t going to start something and not finish again. “Are you going to run away again?” This ache, this need, was too strong. I couldn’t handle rejection a third time.