Falling Read online

  When he reached for me, I waved him off and slid down Betsy’s side by myself. My thighs quaked. I tried to play it off, but I stumbled after the first few steps.

  “If you haven’t been on a horse in a while, it beats you up a little bit,” Jason said.

  “I know the food will make up for the pain I feel right now.”

  “My mother’s cooking makes everything better,” Jason said.

  He and Marisa walked ahead of me, but not before Marisa sent me a look that curbed my need to text Piper. I followed them up the steps, taking each one slowly. Before I joined everyone at the table, I washed up. Jason’s brother, Bill, was there with his wife, Jordan, back from the concert in Denver. He had softer features than Jason’s chiseled body, but it was obvious they were brothers. Jordan was soft-spoken and doted on Alison as though they were gone longer than a night.

  “I don’t understand how I can be so hungry after breakfast just four hours ago,” I said. That didn’t stop me from eyeing the food piled in front of me. I was surprised at the different pastas and sauces. They ate a lot of carbs. After the exercise I’d just endured, I understood the need for them. We said the lunch prayer and dug in. I wanted to know more about Jordan and Bill, but I was too exhausted and too hungry to ask. Marisa stepped up and asked all the appropriate questions. She was quite charismatic. It was nice to see her open up and charm this entire family.

  After lunch, I made a big production of yawning. “I’m going to nap for a bit, so you two go on without me,” I said. I knew Marisa was thinking I wanted to text Piper, but in reality, I was tired. It’s always hard to sleep in a different bed, and we got up early. Sleep was fleeting last night, so I needed to catch up on it, especially since tonight was a big bonfire party. I took a two-minute shower to get the horse smell and dust off and crashed. Three hours later, Marisa shook me awake.

  “Start talking.” Her voice was somewhat sharp.

  “You smell like horse.” I rolled away from her. She poked me incessantly until I rolled over. “What?” Now I was grumpy.

  “Why the sudden interest in Piper? I mean, I don’t think even being her friend is a good idea right now.”

  I sat up and rubbed my eyes. “That’s just ridiculous. She’s a nice woman. If you weren’t so hung up on me being friends with her, you’d like her, too.”

  “I think she’s very nice. I think you are becoming friends with her for the wrong reasons. She’s not ready for you, Shaylie. Since the crash, you’ve been wonderful. You’re so full of life and fun and I just don’t want you to get hurt. I also don’t want you to hurt this woman who lost two, not just one but two people she loved a few months ago. It’s icky and you’re better than that.”

  At least now I knew how she felt. My anger bubbled up and I pushed past her to stand. “I don’t know why this has to be your business. Piper and I are friends. That’s it. Trust me, I get disappointed in myself when I dwell on how beautiful she is or how sweet she is. Right now, she wants a friendship. Don’t forget, she and I will always have a connection. Always,” I said.

  Marisa held her hands up. “Okay, I can’t argue that and I won’t. I can’t imagine what you went through and I sure as hell can’t imagine what she did. I just don’t want you to fall for her for the wrong reasons. She needs time to heal and move on. Don’t get your hopes up. It seems like she wants you as a friend because you’re the only connection she has to their last day, you know?”

  “That makes me feel awesome. Thanks.”

  She grabbed my hands and pulled me into a hug. I was stiff, but when she rubbed my back, I started to relax.

  “You’re the best friend a girl could have. I just don’t want you to fall for someone who isn’t emotionally available. I think she’s great and in different circumstances, I would be your biggest cheerleader, but we don’t know her state of mind or what she’s going through. It’s too soon. You need to trust me,” Marisa said.

  I put my arms around her and sighed. “You’re right. I’ll back off. But I’m already financially invested in yoga, so I’m going to finish her class.” I suddenly remembered the camping trip I agreed to, but that was two months away, and a lot could happen in that time.

  * * *

  The bonfire was spectacular, but I felt like a third wheel. I left my phone in the room and forced myself to be social with the Doogans. Jason and Marisa were in their own world, so I sat next to Virginia and thanked her again for her hospitality.

  “This is a beautiful place,” I said.

  She squeezed my knee. “We’re glad you’re here.”

  “Jason’s a great guy. You should be proud. You did a good job with him.”

  “He has the best heart in the world. And I really like Marisa. She’s sweet and sassy. Jason needs both of those.”

  “If it wasn’t for him, I wouldn’t be here. He saved my life.”

  “I’m just sorry you both had to deal with that. He still doesn’t sleep well. How are you doing physically? You suffered several injuries, right?” She cringed when she asked, as if she knew my answer was going to be bad.

  I held up my arm. “I just got the cast off. My ribs are still sore and my scars are tender to the touch, but I survived.”

  “And here you are, riding horses and playing ranch hand. Remarkable,” she said.

  I laughed. “Oh, I did nothing but get on the back of Betsy. She knew where she was going and I just hung on for the ride. And brushing down the horses after was easy. It actually is very therapeutic for my wrist. I won’t need my physical therapy this week.”

  “You’re a wonderful woman, Shaylie. Strong, determined, and a true delight. Thank you for coming into our lives, however horrible the circumstances were.”

  The tears welled up. Nobody had ever thanked me for being a part of their life before.

  “Don’t worry. This is definitely not the last time you’ll see me,” I said.

  “You’re always welcome here. Even if Jason doesn’t extend a formal invitation.”

  Alison and Jordan broke out the marshmallows and I had my first s’more in over twenty years. I stopped after two. It was so peaceful in front of the fire, under the stars, that I didn’t want to call it a night, but it was late and we planned on getting an early start to salvage some of our Sunday back home.

  “Good night, everyone.” I stood. I hugged those closest to me and winked at Marisa. I was sure to be the one driving home tomorrow since she had long night written all over her face. When I got back to my room, I closed the door, locked it, and immediately checked my phone for messages. I smiled when I saw that I had four messages from Piper.

  I survived my final class.

  Did I ever tell you how much I hate cooking?

  A photo of Clifford was my third message. His flabby belly scraping the ground undermined the fact that he was a yoga cat.

  How’s ranch life? Did I lose you to the great outdoors?

  I smiled wider. I was hers in some fashion.

  Now, I wasn’t an expert on signs, but Piper wanted to talk to me. They were all friendly messages, but could be taken as flirting. Or at least that’s how my heart took them.

  I’m here. We had a bonfire barbecue hoedown or something like that. It was a lot of fun and I ate s’mores.

  That sounds like fun. Did you ride Betsy again?

  Absolutely not. I’m going to wait until I’m completely healed before I climb on a horse again. One cast is enough for me this year. I’m finally able to wear real clothes.

  Well now I feel bad for pushing you in yoga. Sad face.

  Oh don’t! I was fine. I promise. I didn’t want her to feel bad or toss me out of class. I quickly slipped into my pajamas, my phone within reach in case she texted back. I brushed my teeth with my phone beside me on the sink and smiled when I saw her name pop up on my screen. I asked her what she made for dinner since she hated cooking.

  Don’t tell anybody, but I ate at Taco Bell. It’s the worst and the best all rolled up into one delicious and unhea
lthy meal.

  I sent the eye roll emoji. See? In my world Taco Bell is healthy. I imagined you only ate salad and I was surprised when you ordered chicken parm when we all went out.

  Maybe we could do that again? My heart picked up speed. I knew she didn’t mean it as a date, but my heart was ignoring me. It pumped my blood a little quicker.

  I don’t really know what to do with my time, but I need to stay busy.

  And then my heart fell. I felt bad for her, bad that we met under these circumstances. Marisa said it was possible Piper’s sadness would weigh me down, and I was starting to believe it. I couldn’t stop talking to her, though.

  We can definitely do it again. I’m so sorry you are going through so much. I’m here if you want to talk. And I mean it. I’m not just saying it. Everybody always said that when they didn’t have any advice to give. I hoped Piper knew I was sincere.

  Thank you. Just knowing you has helped me.

  I brushed my hair while staring at my phone. Even though I was tired and knew I had to be up in less than six hours, I stayed awake just to talk to Piper. I rubbed my eyes and leaned back against the headboard. Marisa was right. I wasn’t just peering down the rabbit hole of Piper Cole; I had jumped in feet first.

  Chapter Ten

  “So, how was your night?” I pulled out of the ranch’s dirt road and onto pavement, anxious to get back to the city.

  “It was really nice. And no, nothing happened. Not really. Just touching and a lot of kissing. He really is a gentleman.” Marisa’s voice held a slight note of disappointment, but her smile let me know she was okay with it.

  “I’m sure it’s hard to bring women back to the ranch without his family knowing what’s happening. Is he ever going to get his own place? What’s going on there? Do you know?” I reached for one of the donuts Virginia had packed for us. Our travel time was an hour and a half. We had enough food for the entire day.

  “We didn’t talk about it a lot. Maybe when his parents move out, he will move into the apartment and Bill, Jordan, and Alison will move into the main house.”

  “That doesn’t seem fair. I’m sure they have a plan,” I said.

  “Stop getting crumbs everywhere.” Marisa pointed at my lap.

  “Hey, my thighs are catching everything. I’ll keep them there until we stop, okay?”

  “Tell me about your night. Did you talk to Piper when you got back?”

  I wasn’t going to lie because Marisa always knew when I wasn’t telling the truth. “For a little bit. She sent me a few messages during the bonfire. She’s really lonely. She told me last night that she has to keep busy or else she’ll go crazy.”

  “Is she going to therapy? Do you know? God, I would have to,” she said.

  “I don’t know. I just told her she could talk to me about things if she needs to. Not that I’m much help.”

  “I don’t suppose you told her about the make-out session you witnessed on the plane?”

  I cringed. “I wouldn’t even know how to bring something like that up. Plus, why kick her when she’s down? I mean, it doesn’t matter at this point, right?”

  She pointed at me. “You hate secrets. They kill you. Don’t you remember when you found out about Brian and gave him the weekend to tell me he was cheating on me?”

  “That relationship was ridiculous. And I was young. I didn’t know how to turn it off.” We both knew that was bullshit. I liked to purge my feelings, especially when it came to Marisa. But for some reason, I was unwilling to share Piper with her. I was protecting Piper and myself from my best friend’s judgment.

  “You lasted eight hours.”

  “Fuck him. He still cheated on you. That weekend even. I couldn’t help myself. Nobody messes with my bestie,” I said.

  Marisa smoothed down the frown lines on my forehead. “That was a long time ago. No worries there. I really like what I have with Jason,” she said.

  “Virginia’s sweet, isn’t she? She likes you. She said you were sassy.” I emphasized the word “sassy.” “And she said she hated the way Jason and I met, but she’s thankful you and I are in their lives. I’m sure she really meant you, but in order to get to you, they had to go through me.”

  We spent the rest of the trip talking about the ranch. To Marisa’s credit, she didn’t bring up Piper’s name. As sad as I was to see that Piper hadn’t texted the entire drive, I knew it was for the best.

  “Thanks again for doing this for me this weekend. I know you’re still healing, but I had fun and it’s because of you,” Marisa said.

  We were in my driveway. Marisa was behind the wheel with her window rolled down. She pulled her sunglasses down her nose so our eyes could meet.

  “Are you kidding? It was fun to do something different. Not that I’m going to miss Betsy, but I loved seeing my best friend happy.” I leaned down and kissed her cheek. “I’ll see you later this week.”

  She pulled away and I carted my bag up to the house. It was eleven in the morning and I had the whole afternoon to myself. I started laundry and paced. I checked my phone a few times, but the only notifications I received were a handful of emails. I pulled up events in Denver, but nothing appealed to me. Since the crash, I was antsy and always wanted to be outside doing something, anything. I felt stifled in small spaces, small rooms, hell, even my office at work. I couldn’t take the elevator. Even with busted ribs, I climbed the stairs. I knew it was going to take time, and possibly therapy, but right now I was just trying to get back into the rhythm of my life. I picked up the business card of a therapist the airline provided and flipped it over to a schedule she had written in small print on the back. Group therapy was two nights a week. Sundays and Wednesdays were for the survivors only. I knew Jason wouldn’t be there, but I thought it might be good to listen to other people and commiserate with them.

  Did you make it home?

  My heart stopped at Piper’s unexpected text.

  I did. I started laundry and am sitting around bored. What are you doing?

  Nothing. Want to grab a coffee somewhere?

  My heart kick-started at her invitation. I didn’t hesitate. Sure. I could come out there since we both know Peak Brew. I was entirely too accommodating.

  What time?

  How about an hour? I jumped up before she answered and raced to my room to dig out something casual from my wardrobe. I picked out capris that hid my scar and a sleeveless royal blue top. I looked bright and sunny but in desperate need of a tan. Pale was in, at least that’s what I was going with. The only option for my hair was to put it in a bun. I looked at myself in the mirror. I looked ten years older than I was. I let my hair down. It was too straight, but I had no time to style it. I grabbed my keys and headed out like a woman on a mission.

  On the highway, my phone rang. I answered without looking at caller ID. “Hello?”

  “Hi. It’s Piper.”

  I narrowly missed crashing into a minivan. I slowed to normal speed and held the wheel with both hands.

  “Hi. Are you okay?” I hoped she wasn’t canceling.

  “Oh, no. Everything’s fine. I just wanted see if you wanted me to order you something. I secured a table in the back, but it’s pretty crowded here today,” she said.

  I’d forgotten how lovely her voice sounded. She was soft-spoken, yet her voice held a quiet confidence.

  “That would be great. I’d love a vanilla latte. I’ll be there in ten minutes.” My GPS said twelve minutes, so I sped up.

  “Anything else? A cookie? A piece of cake?”

  “Thank you, no. I ate breakfast on the way home. Jason’s mom packed us enough food for a weekend, not an hour-and-a half car ride. I’m stuffed.” My knuckles were white on the steering wheel. I relaxed my grip.

  “Okay, I’ll see you in a few.”

  I ended the call and turned up the radio. I had extra energy I needed to expel. I chose singing. Not my greatest strength, but one that worked well in a time crunch situation. Luckily, I found parking in the lot. I wonde
red if she saw me drive up. I wondered if she could see me now. Just in case, I played it cool. As soon as I walked in, I spotted Piper at a table in the back. She was right. The shop was crowded.

  “Hi. Great timing. We just got our drinks.” Piper leaned in for a hug.

  I held my breath until we broke apart. She smiled as if we were old friends who hadn’t seen one another in a long time. “Thanks again for ordering for me. I’ll get next time.”

  “Sundays are pretty packed around here. I should have warned you.” She leaned closer to me so I could hear her.

  I leaned in, too. We were about two feet apart, close enough that I could see how smooth her skin was. She had a few sprinkles of adorable freckles on her cheeks but none on the bridge of her nose. Her brown eyes with tiny bits of green almost twinkled in the sunlight, and even though I tried really hard not to smile at how pretty she was, I failed.

  “We can finish up here and go somewhere else. Surely there’s a park around, right?” If I thought her eyes twinkled before, the way they sparkled after my suggestion was breathtaking. I smiled bigger.

  “Yes, there’s one on the other side of my building,” she said.

  I drank my coffee in only a few swallows. The heat burned my tongue, but I pushed through the flash of pain.

  “Do you think you’ll go back to the ranch? It sounded like fun.” She sipped her tea. I wished she would drink it faster.

  “I think so. We had a good time,” I tried to focus on our conversation. The guy behind me kept leaning against my chair and I desperately wanted to get out of the café. It was too crowded. I scooted forward until the metal table pressed into my ribs. I winced at the sudden tenderness.

  “Are you okay? Come on. Let’s get out of here now,” she said.

  I gratefully stood. The guy behind me barely waited until I stood to scoot his chair all the way back. I moved my fingers just before he crushed them with the weight of his chair. “Jerk,” I muttered. Piper allowed me to lead, but I felt the heat of her hand near the small of my back as we walked to the front of the café.